you may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one
You know when you want to have a conversation with your mom and you are scared she is going to be disappointed and disagree with everything you say and you so you avoid it at all cost? yeah, I've been doing that for a while now but finally today I decided to just bring up what has been on my mind for a while now.
graduation. yuck, it just sounds gross, doesn't it?
well, let's start off by say I'm a dreamer. when I say I'm a dreamer, I mean I day dream. all. the. time. I get ideas in my head and then I elaborate on them thinking about every. single. detail. [that might be a little dramatic but I do get really into it] sometimes it's bad, sometimes it's good so I've had something on my mind for about a year now so it's finally coming out and I'm hoping it becomes a reality [that's up to the big man upstairs though] lets rewind a bit. January 1-4, 2012. I'm at Passion 2012 and there's this young girl speaking. She's about 19 or so and she's talking about all that she's accomplished over the past couple of years. She works with International Justice Mission who works with local authorities across the world to try to free and restore slaves. [yes, it still exists] Anyways, she was talking, and she hasn't been to college, she doesn't have a degree, she didn't just know people but she's doing something with her life. So I sat there and thought in my 21 year old mind, what am I doing that has meaning? And I couldn't come up with a single thing. Yes, going to college makes me look educated and helps me get a job but what does that mean in regards to Christ's kingdom? So I thought, have been thinking and continue to think about this question and the facts that I speak Spanish, I love people, I love traveling..
So what I'm about to tell you is all hypothetical but it's what's on my heart. I'm thinking about doing missions for a little bit after graduation. Maybe 6 weeks, maybe 6 months, maybe 6 years (well.. I have to pay back a scholarship loan so hopefully God will help with that but if it's meant to be it will all work out) who knows, really? All I do know is that I'm young, excited about this [and I haven't been excited about anything in a while], and I'm seriously praying about it hard!
Back to the whole mom situation. So I was scared to tell her because I thought she might be mad that I am not doing what everyone else does and that I'm copping out. But she totally wasn't like that. She was so loving and thoughtful with everything she said. She had a couple legit fears but we talked them out and she totally supports me. So does my sister-in-law and brother. [even though we already miss each other so much because I've been living in Charlotte full-time]. and my best friends do too. It's great and I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders. I even shed a little tear.
Is my dream coming true? Will you continue to pray with me too?
graduation. yuck, it just sounds gross, doesn't it?
well, let's start off by say I'm a dreamer. when I say I'm a dreamer, I mean I day dream. all. the. time. I get ideas in my head and then I elaborate on them thinking about every. single. detail. [that might be a little dramatic but I do get really into it] sometimes it's bad, sometimes it's good so I've had something on my mind for about a year now so it's finally coming out and I'm hoping it becomes a reality [that's up to the big man upstairs though] lets rewind a bit. January 1-4, 2012. I'm at Passion 2012 and there's this young girl speaking. She's about 19 or so and she's talking about all that she's accomplished over the past couple of years. She works with International Justice Mission who works with local authorities across the world to try to free and restore slaves. [yes, it still exists] Anyways, she was talking, and she hasn't been to college, she doesn't have a degree, she didn't just know people but she's doing something with her life. So I sat there and thought in my 21 year old mind, what am I doing that has meaning? And I couldn't come up with a single thing. Yes, going to college makes me look educated and helps me get a job but what does that mean in regards to Christ's kingdom? So I thought, have been thinking and continue to think about this question and the facts that I speak Spanish, I love people, I love traveling..
So what I'm about to tell you is all hypothetical but it's what's on my heart. I'm thinking about doing missions for a little bit after graduation. Maybe 6 weeks, maybe 6 months, maybe 6 years (well.. I have to pay back a scholarship loan so hopefully God will help with that but if it's meant to be it will all work out) who knows, really? All I do know is that I'm young, excited about this [and I haven't been excited about anything in a while], and I'm seriously praying about it hard!
Back to the whole mom situation. So I was scared to tell her because I thought she might be mad that I am not doing what everyone else does and that I'm copping out. But she totally wasn't like that. She was so loving and thoughtful with everything she said. She had a couple legit fears but we talked them out and she totally supports me. So does my sister-in-law and brother. [even though we already miss each other so much because I've been living in Charlotte full-time]. and my best friends do too. It's great and I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders. I even shed a little tear.
Is my dream coming true? Will you continue to pray with me too?
Comments
I do the exact same thing with my mom. She kinda shoots down my dreams every now and then, and it's sad and depressing.
I love your dream (and I'm happy your mom does to!). From what I can tell in the few short times we've met, is that God has such a huge impact on your life! I love it, and am actually kind of/super jealous.
I can't wait to see where your dream takes you. :)
ps take of word verification it's taken me 3 tries to post this!